Adventure Story Competition - Winner

‘TODAY WILL BE A GOOD DAY’ the postcard on the bathroom mirror said.
Clara stared at it until it just became a pink and green blur, and the daisies around the border were no more than squiggly lines. Today will be a good day. Today will be a good day. She counted to four while breathing in, then counted to six on the out breath. Today was a day for doing something new. Today was a day full of possibilities.
‘A comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there,’ she whispered under her breath. Who said that? She couldn’t remember, but it was a good mantra for today. She drew her eyes away from the postcard and concentrated on her own reflection for a moment. Was she passable? Probably.
She’d picked out an outfit for the occasion - just jeans and a jumper, but it was a definite upgrade from the tracksuits she’d taken to wearing every day lately. The leggings and the baggy T-shirts, everything designed for comfort, for her comfort zone.
Her hair was freshly washed and she’d applied a thin layer of pink lipstick. Passable. No big deal, but in truth it was a big deal of a day.
The clock said 8.30am. She had half an hour until she had to leave and face what was in store for her. She slowly walked down the stairs. Thirteen stairs. An odd number never felt right. It would be better if there were twelve or fourteen stairs. Sat on the sofa already wearing her coat she picked up her handbag and emptied it. Tissues. A mirror. Paracetamol. Her purse. Her medication. A hairbrush. A novel. She repacked her bag. Then emptied it again to double check.
*****
Three streets away, Alison sat on the sofa nearest the window sipping at her coffee. She knew she had to be early. She knew what the rules were. Always be there first. Sit somewhere noticeable. It was raining, but not too hard. That was good. Extremes of weather were not good.
Extremes of weather were not safe conditions. She wondered whether her little sister would turn up. They’d tried this before, meeting up for a coffee but something always went wrong to prevent Clara from coming. Alison knew not to take it personally, it was never Clara’s fault, but sometimes it was hard. She had almost limitless patience, but there were days when she couldn’t help but feel a nagging frustration towards her sister. Why could she not just do the things that she’d committed to?
Alison had a full time job as a support worker and her time was limited but she and Clara had this arrangement once a month. Meet for coffee on the day Alison was doing the evening shift. Clara worked from home, she was a freelance writer, although Alison suspected she wasn’t being too productive these days. She spoke of working on a novel, but a first draft had yet to appear. Alison sighed and checked her phone for the time, or for missed calls or panicked messages. No contact so far. It was 8.50am.
*****
Clara had checked and rechecked the contents of her bag four times now. She wasn’t forgetting anything. It was 8.55. To be on time she had to leave in the next few minutes. She stood up. She felt the panicky flutter of a palpitation rising up in her chest. She coughed to try and get rid of it and sat down again. ‘Adventure is out there,’ she muttered to herself. She was quoting a Disney film.
Clara had had big plans of travelling the world when she finished studying and went out into the real world, but the real world quickly turned against her and made her rethink this. She had barely left her own country. She spent a lot of time sitting on her sofa under a blanket watching the Travel Channel and reading travel guides, but she was realistic. She knew it would probably never happen for her. It wasn’t safe. Anything could happen in a new place.
She stood up again. This was it. This was her adventure for now. She knew Alison was waiting for her, and she knew Alison’s patience wore thin at times. She didn’t always only think of herself, no matter how it seemed. She opened the door and looked out. Rain. Not too hard though. Light rain she could handle. Light rain was okay. Heavy rain was too overwhelming and it was better to stay inside. It was 9.03. She was going to be late. She needed to leave.
*****
Alison checked the time again. 9.07. Usually if Clara couldn’t make it she would have heard by now so this was promising. She didn’t want to get her hopes up though, it was easier not to. She’d been nursing her coffee since 8.30 and it was cold, so she ordered a fresh one. Just in case Clara did turn up.
*****
Clara took a step outside into her front garden. The wind blew lightly through her hair. It was quite refreshing really. The panic wasn’t that bad. She locked the door. Locking the door always seemed final. She walked to her front gate and hesitated. She turned back to check the front door was locked, and then she tried again. Leaving the front gate and closing it behind her, Clara took in a deep breath. This was the furthest she’d been on her own in seven months. She’d been outside, but never without her sister or her mum to support her to their car. And she hadn’t walked anywhere in much longer.
Sometimes a single step feels like a mile. Sometimes a mile feels like one hundred. Each step taking her away from safety, from her cocoon where nothing bad can happen. In her cocoon there was no shame, there was no embarrassment and she could move around with ease. Outside her safe space, anything could happen. Anything horrible, and she would have no control over any of it. There were other people out here. Who knew what their intentions were. Or were they looking at her? There was a man leaving his driveway across the road and he was definitely staring. She looked down at herself. Was something wrong with her? But she couldn’t see anything. Her breath quickened, and she started back towards home. She stopped and did her breathing exercises. A quick glance around showed the man had gone. He probably hadn’t even noticed her. Breathe in for four counts, breathe out for six. In for four, out for six. Today will be a good day. Today will be a good day. She only had to walk down three roads. Alison would be waiting for her there. ‘Concentrate on Alison,’ she said to herself.
Concentrate on Alison. Today is a good day. I’m not scared. Concentrate on Alison. Today is a good day. I’m not scared. Clara wasn’t looking up. She was watching her feet take the steps that were leading her away from safety as she repeated her mantras inside her head. Away from safety, but towards Alison, and Alison was safe. Her heart was racing, and the edges of her vision were blurring. She wasn’t giving in this time. She wasn’t. Alison had been so supportive. She couldn’t let her down. She stopped and rummaged in her bag for her anxiety medication, and took a couple of pills. I am invincible. I’m not scared. Today is a good day. Make Alison proud. She took her phone from her pocket and checked the time. 9.20. It had taken her ten minutes to walk down one road. She quickly took a picture of where she was and sent it over to Alison. And then she carried on going.
*****
When Alison’s phone vibrated she immediately assumed this was the message to say that Clara couldn’t do it, she was staying home, could Alison please meet her there instead. The picture she received instead warmed her more than the coffee ever could. This was the furthest Clara had made it since they came up with this arrangement. This was massive progress. If Clara could do this, then they could move on. They could build up to day trips. They could maybe go to their cousin’s wedding together in Scotland next year. Clara always wanted to see the world, more than Alison did. It was unfair that this had happened to her. Excitement was buzzing through her.
*****
Clara could see the cafe where Alison was waiting for her. She was so close. She had almost made it. She stopped walking and took stock of her surroundings. It was quiet, but there was a young woman with a pushchair across the road, the baby crying mournfully. Well that was okay. That was normal. Sometimes we all want to cry mournfully.
She picked up her pace as she approached the cafe. She could see Alison sitting in the window seat. Alison knew the rules. Be early so Clara didn’t have to be alone. Sit somewhere noticeable so Clara didn’t have to look for her.
Alison rushed to the door the moment she saw Clara approach and enveloped her in a hug. She led her inside, and held her hand as she sat down.
‘I already ordered you a hot chocolate with cream,’ she said, ‘I thought it would be easier.’
‘Thank you,’ Clara whispered. They held hands across the table.
‘We can stay here for as long as you like. Five minutes or five hours. You didn’t let it win today, Clara,’ Alison kept her eyes on Clara. Clara focused on the eye contact, this was safe.
‘Adventure is out there,’ Clara said quietly, feeling happy and strong as she sipped the cream from her hot chocolate.